Welcome, MAAN members!

[Lil]

Welcome aboard, ms5. You're a good sport to jump into a place where you don't know us and we know some things about your sitch. This is a mixed bag of people. I'm a childless widow, age 60+ We have people married with lots of kids at home, some with kids in college, some iwth kids who won't leave- lol. Some divorced and still single, some re-coupled. Some struggling with health problems, simple to dire. We're all over the country. Most of don't know the others' real names. Unlike some online communities, we do not meet IRL and have no plans to do so. Look forward to getting to know you.


Sent from my BlackBerry. Big thumbs, teeny keys.

[IFoundIt]

Welcome ms5. I'm not a frequent poster, but I want you to feel welcome, as I certainly don't believe anyone here thinks of you as a she-devil! In fact, I don't know much about you at all - other than you are Mrs. Cinco and I would assume that you are undoubtedly struggling right now with his revelations. I hope you are pleasantly surprised by the support you might find here. Also, I hope you won't mind your own business for long, because I already like your courage and feistiness!

[Saffie]

Hi ms5, {wish there was a waving hand icon},

Let me introduce myself, (and hopefully not scare you off-lol).

I am NOW a happily married mom - married to the same guy for 24 years this Sept 20th. We haven't always been happy and my H had an A.

I have 4 children ranging in age from 12yrs old to 19yrs old. ( D19, D17 - a feisty piece of work,S15 and D12).

Last year my eldest D went to college and I struggled very badly with that, even though I had the other three at home. I HATE the empty nesting feeling - it makes me depressed and turn inwards. I am already dreading my D returning to college at the end of this month. Unfortunately when I am hurting I don't tend to turn outwards for help but rather spiral down hill and get very introverted.

This little group have been my sanity on occasions as I do suffer with bad depression from time to time, and I find it hard to talk to others about it in real life.

I also have some good friends who I email privately off the board, but who I found here....and they are a fantastic network.

Everyone is pro M, (well as far as I can tell).

So a big hello, and I hope you get more from this experience than your first post indicates you think you will.

If you are able to, don't lurk, make friends: we are all here to help and no-one is here to judge your writing style etc.

We would love to know more about you and your take on things. There are a few of us gals who are having trouble adjusting to our children moving on to college and the such like and we take comfort from one another. Taking that step in to the next phase of our lives can be horribly hard.

Oh, and I am based in the UK and am a crazy horse lady!!!!!

Lovely to see you here.

[Baltoman]

Sept 1, 2010 16:39:45 GMT -5 Mrs. Cinco said:

And not to worry, I will mind my own business.

We don't do so well with minding our own business around here. I do believe you are welcome to mind anyone's business you care to. Anyway, welcome.

[Mrs. Cinco]

@ Bagheera:

Don't worry...I'm completely relaxed! I have a somewhat tongue-in-cheek, self-deprecating sense of humor. Not everyone gets it, and it makes others mad. But hey, it always worked for Rodney Dangerfield--can't be all bad!

Lil:

Thank you for the welcome. I am sorry about your widow-hood status. Yeah, I don't get out much, so I really have no plans on meeting anyone from any message board IRL. Plus I'd be too chicken. LOL!

And I can dig it about those big thumbs/tiny keys thing...

@ Saffie:

Long-armed, across the pond (((hugs))) for you.

I know exactly how you are feeling with that separation thing. I haven't been too big of a cry baby about it, which surprises me. I really only cry whenever we meet up with her in person. I am very, very sad though. However, I am ALSO a college student, so that really helps me distract myself from a lot of those feelings (and many others as well). Lucky for you, you have the other 3 to keep you busy. I fear your worst will be when the baby goes.

I also understand the turning inward/introversion. I don't really want to "burden" anyone with things that bother me, so I clam up. It is even worse when I say them aloud and they sound so trivial. Most of it is stuff one would say, "geesh, why can't you just get over it and move on?"....seems I hear that a lot lately. But a lot of it is really big TO ME, so rather than hear that said, I turn inward. Honey, I soooo get it!

@ IFoundIt:

Feisty! YES! that is the word I was searching for! I can be quite feisty at times, unfortunately, it comes across totally wrong in writing! (well I guess IRL too!) Courage? naw...that one is so not applicable to moi. But I give it the college try and sometimes it works.

@ Baltoman:

I guess no one would be here if they were interested in minding their OWN business at that, eh?


Thank you to all that have welcomed me. It makes me feel a little bit better about taking this giant leap.

Cheers!

[DQ]

Mrs.5....Welcome and (((hugs))). I'm so happy you are here. I hope you stick around and contribute in whatever capacity you are comfortable with. I have prayed for your family for a long time, so it feels like I already know you. (Hope that doesn't sound creepy, LOL!) Again welcome!

[Saffie]

ms5.

Thanks for the (((((hugs))))))).

I look forward to us getting to know each other better.

It has taken me a long time to realise, ( you'll get used to me using 's' instead of the American bastardisation of 'z' ;D), that it doesn't matter if something that bothers me is something someone else would find trivial; if it's affecting me then it's affecting me......and I need an opportunity to deal with it. My H has a hard time with that sometimes......but he is learning that if he leaves me alone when I tell him I am internally trying to sort something out, it is better in the long run. I know he hurts when I don't turn to him when I am upset - but that's just my default mode. Due to the way I was parented I learnt it was better to keep quiet about problems rather than share and have them trivialised, or be told to just buck up . That's where this place has proven to be a god send.

I envy you being at college. I keep thinking about doing another degree, but I don't feel able to give up the horses and juggling both is beyond me - oh, and I guess I shouldn't forget adding the children in to that mix - lol.

We all like a good sharp sense of humour around here too, so it sounds like you will fit in very nicely.

BTW, gotta warn you IC is the board clown - I am sure you will 'meet' him soon. Don't let his superficial persona fool you - that guy is wicked, (in a good way), and razor sharp.............and although he is married to the gorgeous Rebecca, he is still Saffie's Bad By Toy!!!!

[Lil]

ms5: I don't really want to "burden" anyone with things that bother me, so I clam up. It is even worse when I say them aloud and they sound so trivial. Most of it is stuff one would say, "geesh, why can't you just get over it and move on?"....seems I hear that a lot lately.

Only a mean person would say that to you. And you shouldn't say that to yourself either.

If I hear people being mean to themselves, I usually say something...

I'm a college student, too...

[Haphazard]

Ms5 Welcome! Great you could make it-can't say much -broken kebyoard

[Colleen]

Welcome, Ms5. I do hope your experience here will be a healing one, both for you and for Cinco. And I also hope you aren't easily weirded-out, some of us here are a little, how shall I say, different. Some interesting journeys here. C'mon in, make yourself at home, pull up a chair, sit by the fire, and let us get to know you. And, ref the self-deprecation, I see Lil beat me to it, I was gonna say, that doesn't generally work 'round here...

[Baltoman]

Sept 2, 2010 15:19:39 GMT -5 Saffie said:

It has taken me a long time to realise, ( you'll get used to me using 's' instead of the American bastardisation of 'z' ;D)

You invented the language. We perfected it. Cheers!

[Cinco]

Umm I guess I should have been referring to ms5 as Ms. Cinco all his time instead of Mrs. Cinco.

Wow you finally joined! I really am glad that you decided to give this a try. Everyone here is so cool and friendly (well except Bagherra giving me lumps sometimes). You won't regret it I promise.

I know it hurts you so much that D17 is off at college and seems quite content with herself about it. I miss her too you know, it's like something is missing at home now.

Sorry I didn't see that you had posted sooner. I haven't been on in a couple of days.

Thanks everyone for giving Ms. Cinco the warm welcomes. She is a really cool and clever lady... that's why I married her. ;D

Cinco

[Mrs. Cinco]

Thanks dear for welcoming me!

Hey, that's my dresser!!! Don't be posting any other pics of this house. That maid needs to be fired!

ms is just so much easier to type! You know I don't care what you call me just as long as you call me...

D17 is off at college

Correction: D18!!!! Can you believe it?

Thanks for telling them I'm cool & clever! ha! Just keep reminding them of that!

[Mrs. Cinco]

Thanks for the welcome:

DQ - I need all the prayers I can get! And I have a pretty good idea of who you are, nice to meet you! No, not creepy, just feel a little disadvantaged is all.

Haphazard - sorry about the keyboard, that is annoying, isn't it? get a new one and get to chattin'!

Tim - Hi Tim! Frankly, it takes a lot for me to get "weirded out", but it is possible. I'm pretty open minded about most things, until it comes to my child! Thanks for the healing wishes.

~cheers!

[DQ]

Ms5...I can understand you feeling disadvantaged, so here I'll intro myself directly to you:

(curtsey) Hi! I'm Dance Queen. My name got "littled" to DQ on this board.

I'm happily married, but it is my second marriage. For the past 2 - 3 years, many of the people on this board and I "met" on another board and talked about relationships and life. These people are very sweet and sincere, and one of them is Cinco. Although there are many I didn't know before on this particular board, I'm finding them to be a whole lotta fun. During the earlier years of my current relationship, I went seeking out information to help me build and sustain a great marriage, and help me cope with and understand my mistakes in my previous marriage so I could avoid them. This group helped me a lot with my own path, and also just by being great friends.

Cinco's story and his love for you really "pulled me in" so to speak, and we became friends. Many times I said things to him like "if only we could be friends with Mrs. Cinco, too". He told me "maybe that will happen one day" and he also told this board that he hoped you would join. I'm sure everyone here is/was delighted to know you finally! I certainly am.

If you don't belong to any other on-line community, you may think its weird that people can have real friendships on-line. My hubby certainly thinks its weird and doesn't have any on-line friends. I respect his confusion, as it really does seem weird that you can develop the necessary bond to make a "friendship" when you've never met or seen these people! But my experience with this particular group has proven to me that a mental connection is all that is really needed to make a friendship. After you are mentally connected, your heart will follow and will make that friendship bond.

My heart has been following you and Cinco's developments for a few years now, and I want you to know straight up - - he has been nothing but totally in love with you that whole time, and has also been a truly supportive friend toward others' in their trials and tribulations.

He has said nothing but loving things about you, which is why we are all so happy to meet you finally!

Welcome...

[Admin]

Sept 4, 2010 14:08:18 GMT -5 DQ said:

(curtsey) Hi! I'm Dance Queen. My name got "littled" to DQ on this board.

{wave's magic moderator wand} Hmm...look at that!

(change it back if you like -- I couldn't resist)

[Lil]

In my neck of the woods, "DQ" means Dairy Queen... gotta love that banana split blizzard and an order of crispy tacos- they go perfectly together.

Ms5, I first joined the board that was the predecessor to the predecessor of this one on Sept 11, 2003. It is amazing that you can make very good friends online. But is it really so odd? In the past, people had penpals that they corresponded with. A good friend of mine had a pen pal in England that he wrote to for almost 50 years.

When I joined the BB, I had been a widow for two years. I was in a relationship with an active alcoholic and it was a very rocky ride. I grew a lot in that relationship, but we broke up in 2007 and I'm really glad to be out of it!

I didn't know Cinco from the original BB, but got to know a little of his story over the last couple of years. EVERYONE here has an interesting story! Problems, triumphs- some things quite out of the ordinary, and some things that everyone can identify with.

We get along for the most part, but occasionally there are tiffs and hurt feelings. This new board has a rule against name-calling, and that's probably good. It's just like any group of friends IRL except you have to provide your own snacks and coffee.

[Kettricken]

Welcome on board, Ms.Cinco! It's kind of a bummer that this isn't the "previous" board ... there, you could have gone through the older threads and collected as much dirt as you wanted on all of us.

Nonetheless, shouldn't take long (grin). I see you've already been warned about IC, so you're good to go. (wink)

[KidC]

Hi Ms. Cinco. I just wanted to chime in with my own greeting. I've been watching Cinco struggle to be a better man, especially in his relationship with you, for a few years now, and I've really been rooting for both of you. I know it must be a little hard to just jump in to a community of people who already know each other, but one great thing about a BB (bulletin board) community is that you can be as present as you like without actually having to go any where, so it's pretty easy to become part of it pretty quickly. I hope you feel free to join in the many discussions we're having. Everyone is interested in what you might have to say.

[Mrs. Cinco]

DQ:
Thank you for your intro. It sounds like you have found the magic combination for marriage #2. Good for you! And congratulations!

Yes, I know friendships can blossom and develop amongst online communities. And it can be a "dangerous" path to tread for many reasons. I, like your H, think it is a little weird. Too annonymous for the most part. I am naturally a suspicious person. Just am.

I love him and I know he loves me. And I know he loves the people here. I also know that he has not always

said nothing but loving things about you,

but I have some mean family members and older brothers so I have always tried, for the most part, to let that kind of stuff go. Does sting sometimes though.

I'm happy to meet you all too!


Lil:
Did you say snacks??? mmmmm I love Dairy Queen! Hey what are you studying in college?

Kettricken:
Thank you for the welcome. Previous board...well, he has been inviting me since then. I just haven't been so sure I wanted to discover all that "dirt". Warned about IC, yes, moreover, I have really liked most of his responses that I've seen so far! ;D

KidC:
Thanks for chiming! Yes he is struggling, but he will get there. He usually gets whatever he sets his mind to. He's a pretty determined guy. Yeah, BB's are weird to make friends on. I have been a member on others, but I am usually one of those lost amongst the crowd and current "in group". That is why I usually lurk, well that and most of the time someone has already voiced the opinion I hold or answered the question by the time I see the topic.

Thanks for rooting for us!